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Freeman Hits Ball 40 Acres And Runs Like A Mule

I wonder if Freddie Freeman has Fletch-like dreams where he pictures himself with a huge afro and his name is Freddie World B. Freeman.  "He's actually 6-5, with the afro, 6-9.  Pretty good hands,...

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Closer Report: Philly’s Blunt, Time For Pat

The worst news in terms of closers, especially in a situation like Philadelphia, is the word: committee.  I mean, it is kind of like getting free tickets to see the Village People, hell yes they are...

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One If By Land, Three If By Seager

Our Commissioner Manfred presses his intercom, "Please escort in the Guatemalan baseball stitchers."  Manfred's secretary brings six men dressed in blanket ponchos and straw hats.  Their leader steps...

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Points Leagues: Great Britton

Okay, if I'm being honest, what I've attempted to do in this post is completely experimental. While based on statistics it's really just a wild attempt to calculate which closers are bringing home the...

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Nat Turner’s Treabellion

You wanna know frustration?  Of course, you do.  You play fantasy baseball!  We've chosen a hobby that is the least relaxing hobby possible.  May as well have a hobby of picking cheese off mousetraps....

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Closer Report, Week 9 – Jazzy Jeff And Will The Thrill

Situations arise all the time with closers. Injuries occur, poor performance, and then the return of the incumbent.  In the preseason, Will Smith was the guy the Brewers had tabbed as the closer....

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Closer Report, Week 11 – Perkins? Should Have Went to Shoney’s

The save buffet line in Minnesota is becoming a tiresome "wait-and-see who gets the chance today".  We all sit there and wait to own all the bullpen condiments that they offer, whether it be Brandon...

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Closer Report, Week 13: My Father The Fish

So this year, like so many before, the closer trade market is always an interesting cocktail mixer of events that shake things up.  The Padres waited to be first, which makes zero sense... but also...

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Razznasty League Update: Can’t Truss It!!

Sometimes you ask and you shall receive and in that vein, I begin this month's Razznasty update. Now I know the two questions you're asking, what did you ask for and receive? And which vein? First,...

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Closer Report: Second Half Rankings

I am always a day late and a buck short on the posts because I am relegated to be the Saturday morning cartoon of the Razzball variety.  No worries, I mean, who doesn't love 80's cartoons and can't...

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Jo-Fer’s Cheese Stakes Out Some TastyK’s In Philly

"But I can't Jo-Fer that (Jo can do).  No, I can't Jo-Fer that, (Jo can do).  Oh, I can't Jo-Fer that (Jo can do), I can't Jo-Fer that, can't Jo-Fer that, can't Jo-Fer that, but Jo can do!"  I can do...

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Napoli Is En Firenze

Mike Napoli hit his 27th homer yesterday.  He now has five straight games with a home run.  On the year, he is top 30 for fantasy value on our Player Rater.  Dude is such butter right now brioche buns...

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Closer Report, Week 18: Miller Ain’t Buffaloing Cody

The price that was paid, and the results that led him up to the trade had everyone believing that Andrew Miller would trump the incumbent Cody Allen in Cleveland.  Through two-pitched games, he has...

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Closer Report, Week 20: Dyson’s Tender With Saves

I wish that he wasn't... and I wish I could parse my words a little better for a good pun's sake, but the fact is in the stats.  Sam Dyson is allowing more baserunners, more baserunners to get on via...

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Closer Report, Week 22: Wade Back To Where You Came From

So the inevitable return of Wade Davis came, and just like we expected in typical awful luck scenario, he came into the game for the save.  Which any Kelvin owner was dreading, clutching their fists,...

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In Computer Technology And Fantasy, There’s A Future In Villar

We interrupt your regularly scheduled Grey post for my shenanigans.  Hi all, I'm Razzball's resident Troy McClure.  You might remember me from such times as when I used to write more than just our DFS...

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Cardinals Can’t Handle Any Mo’ Lesters

You know one of those posters where they feature celebrities from different eras that may or may not have ever been together in the same room?  Like James Dean, Mickey Mouse and Lenny Bruce standing at...

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Closer Report, Week 24 – Final Frontier

When it's fourth and long and 20 years ago, I believe the old song from the sea goes... You don't look at the stats to date, especially when it's with two weeks to play. What is ahead of you is all...

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Jo-Fer Is A National Security Risk

In order to be competitive, the Marlins would need All-Stars at every position all farmed from their minor league system.  Sorta like what the Cubs have managed to do.  Not impossible, but that's what...

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Another Ace In Queens Has A Jacked-Up Arm

Steven Matz is likely done for the year after hurting his shoulder again.  I'm not even joking.  I kinda wish I were.  NY Post writer, Joel Sherman's headline, "How Terry Collins broke Matz news to...

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